CPE Formal Letter Sample from student with Feedback

Dear Gustavo,

I came across your website and I would like to accept the offer to send a writing task for correction.

In the attachment you will find a letter to the editor.

I am preparing for the CPE Exam in May.

Thanks in advance for your time and I look forward to hear from you.

Best wishes,

Miranda Star

 Dear Editor,

I am writing in response to a letter from one reader in the Saturday’s edition of your magazine stating that family life has not changed over the last twenty years. I would like to point out some opinions on this topic.

In the first place, when we discuss about family life we must take a closer look at the variation within families as constituted in the past twenty years. A family plays different roles. In the modern world of today there are many types of how families are formed. Besides the traditional families with a father and mother figure there are single-parent families, gay-parents, community families and grand-parents who play a significant role in the family. Researchers even say that fifty percent of the families nowadays have only one parent or consist of another non-typical combination. (Feedback: Make a clear point in line one and then develop your idea. Example. In line one: I personally believe that the idea of family has changed a lot in the last few years... argument...argument...example).

Secondly,  I would like to mention that the variation in types of families also have an impact on how children deal with relationships, it is not necessarily a problem, for example, without having a ‘father-figure’ present it might be challenging for girls to interact with male figures in her life such as teachers, employers and friends. Whereas a boy growing up without a ‘mother-figure’ might miss crucial lessons from the soft side taught by a woman. But, children are flexible and find other people in their life to fulfil the missing role or people in their families adjust to act in behalf of the missing figure. (Feedback: Interesting point but how is it connected to the statement "Families have not changed..." ??? maybe give another reason why families have changes. For example in the past only fathers worked but now both parents do ...etc or the father works in France and the mother in Spain...etc)

With that said, we can say that male, female and any type of family combination are capable to raise their children. (??? is this your conclusion? - is it connected to the topic? ) However,  society is not always prepared for a-typical families and judgement is lurking. Therefore, I would like to suggest to publish an article which shows the change in family-life and its varieties . Also, showing examples might be useful to show it is possible to be a successful family in an unconventional way.  

Yours faithfully,

Miranda Star